Something cool to read by the pool – A Hairdresser’s Diary

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If you have not already read ‘A Hairdresser’s Diary’ now might be a great time to enjoy this inspirational memoir. You can find it at any of these links. Read the reviews and then write your own. You can get it in e-book or printed form. If you prefer an autographed copy you can now get a digital signature for your e-book on Amazon.ca or .com.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Hairdressers-Diary-looking-reflection-ourselves/dp/1475164289/ref=zg_bsnr_220855011_12

 

http://www.lulu.com/shop/search.ep?keyWords=A+Hairdresser%27s+Diary&categoryId=100501

 

http://www.ahairdressersdiary.com/

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FLABBERMOUTH Stories # 3

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Flabbermouth # 3

 

 I was not going to share this story with anyone to-day with Christmas so close, but I think it might be a positive thing. My friend Cheryl just called to tell me she is still laughing and doesn’t think she will stop anytime soon.

            Cheryl came for a Christmas coffee this evening. She noticed the card I had from our vet with our late Cercie’s footprint on it. We started talking about our furry family members who had passed. We discussed how we felt they left us far too soon. I talked about my Cercie and she talked about her Wishbone. I teared up for a few moments, as I remembered how Cercie buried her weary head in my bosom, while the vet relieved her of her unbearable pain.

            Cheryl asked, “Did you have her cremated to keep her?”

            “No, we just had her paw print made. It is preserved on that plaque on the fireplace.”

            She said, “I can handle anything, but cremation.” She added with a shudder, “I had to watch a movie on it for nursing and I found it far too hard to absorb.”

            We talked about how she cannot be in the same room with ashes, even her own pets. I felt bad for her. I knew, by the look on her face that this was a very uncomfortable subject. Yet, I also could see it was something she wanted to share with me. Her husband and she had a heated discussion about their pet being cremated and she was afraid she was losing.

            I remembered that once before she had told me, she and her hubby would be cremated when the time came. “Have you changed your mind?” I asked.

            “No. It just creeps me out and I can’t help it.”

            “Well,” I said, “Ron and I have our plans already. The fact we are being buried in a family plot dictates cremation.” I continued, “As a matter of fact, I told Ron that we should consider a plan I have.”

            “What is that?” Cheryl asked.

            “I think we should be buried in the same Urn, at the same time.”

            “How would that work?” She questioned with a frown.

            “Well whoever goes first would be kept in the Urn until the other passes.” I continued with, “Then, when the other one goes we would be put in the same urn together.”

            Flabbermouth striking again said, “The only thing I ask is that no one shakes us up. I don’t want something stuck in my mouth that should not be there, especially for eternity.”

            Cheryl started to laugh so hard, she was snorting. “Oh my gawd,” She cried through her snorts. “Chris, only you could take something I am afraid of and make me see it in a whole new light.” Hunched over with a stitch in her side and through tears, she repeated, “I am so happy I came for coffee tonight, I just hope I can drive home without the car shaking.”

            The phone rang disrupting the moment. Her hubby wanted her to go pick up her kids at soccer and go home. She could not even talk to him she was laughing so hard.

            “Yep she is on her way,” I told him.

            “Is everything alright?” he asked.

            “Absolutely, alright.” I replied

            As I said in the beginning of this story, Cheryl just called. She wanted to tell me she may never fear cremation again, but the vision I left in her head is disturbing to say the least. My last words to her before I hung up, “And you thought the Kama Sutra left images.” She started to laugh again and I could hear her snorting between, “Only you Chris, only you.”

            “Good night, Cheryl.”

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My Flabbermouth Series – chapter 2

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Chapter Two

 

Sometimes remembering the flabbermouth moments are painful. This is especially true when I realize just how dumb I really sound. In some cases, it might take a few minutes or so to sink in. Remember the reference from the last story, my not being the brightest bulb on the tree? This is one of those occasions. I however cannot believe my family still has it in their memory bank. They cannot remember my birthday, but this is burned into their brains.

The family and I were sitting on the couch watching a science – health show one evening on tv. The discussion was on how individual parts of the body function and moves.
The first part of the program was based on the problems and function of our joints.
The second part discussed the damage that could be done by smoking and what it does to the organs and growth hormones. I found all of this rather interesting and it had me thinking. I was taking it all in as at that time, Ron was a heavy smoker. I on the other hand had never parted my lips for the deadly cancer stick. So in my mind part of getting Ron to quit smoking, would be in this new-found knowledge.

When the first part of the show was over. Ron noticed I was staring at him intensely, “What on earth are you looking at?” He said with a rather inquisitive look on his face.
“I was just thinking.”
“Oh no, not again.”
“Yes again, the show has made me think,”
With that, he rolled his eyes and the kids laughed.

“Oh oh, moms thinking again,” piped up one of our rug rats.

Now I was determined to show them I could say something smart. So out it came. “Honey I want to be serious now ok? I have an important. When we talk, what jaw moves our top or bottom one?”
“You are kidding right?” Ron questioned with a furrowed brow.
“No!” I was annoyed he would put it that way.

Then as if the family had rehearsed the response for weeks, they in unison started talking. Moving their heads up and down, pushing their heads back trying to keep their bottom jaw still. They were laughing so hard they almost rolled on the floor. “Anymore questions dear. Does any one have anything to say to your mom?” Hysterically one after the other they teased me. I soon saw the humour in the latest ‘flabbermouth’ moment.

That night when we went to bed Ron apologized for being so hard on me but he said, “Honey you have to admit it was pretty funny?”
“I know now it was.” I said embarrassed but still able to laugh.

And then, ‘flabbermouth’ hit me again. “At least I didn’t tell you I was worried about smoking stunting your growth.”
With that, Ron reached over and patted me on the head and as I turned around to face him he said, “Like this?” There he was with his tee-shirt pulled up over his arm with only his hand showing wiggling his fingers at me. I slapped him and rolled over but not before hearing. “Honey life would be so dull without you?” With that, he got one more giggle in before falling asleep.

What God dropped into our laps

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We have all heard the story about the abandoned kittens. The ones left on the doorstep or thrown away like trash, by some uncaring and heartless person. Well I have a different kind of story one I promise will melt your heart.Above is the picture of a perfect and beautiful baby kitten. She is only 3 or 4 weeks old.

I want to start at the beginning. Most of my readers will recall me talking about our beloved Cercie.

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She was our baby for 19 years. We acquired her when she was only a couple of weeks older than this little angel you see here. Last year when she could no longer take care if herself and she started to get weak we were advised to have her put to sleep. I held her as she drifted away and the look in her eyes was “thank you mommy” she went peacefully and didn’t even struggle. I am telling you this for two reasons, one because we swore we would never have another animal again. We were so broken-hearted and two, because the cat (approx 4 weeks ago) that everyday walked down our fence and jumped onto our roof looks identical to Cercie. The first time I saw her my heart caught in my throat. I thought I was looking at a  reincarnated Cercie.

We didn’t pay much attention as Cercie in her youth used to jump from the fence to the roof as well. But the day before yesterday ( in the evening) I could hear a noise, a very faint noise which sounded like a bird or maybe a kitten. I brought it to Ron’s attention but it was faint and very random so we dismissed it. The next morning, Ron heard it again but this time more constant and a bit louder. We could hear it the  loudest in the front hall closet. Ron, wanting to see if there was an animal in distress went into the attic and looking in the area where the noise was coming from he saw mommy cat. Her head was peeking out from between the walls. First of all, he was concerned how she would have got in and also he was concerned about the kitten we were hearing. We could only hear one. It was not long after mommy saw Ron, that we saw her walking down the street. Ron was concerned and called the vet in town who assured him that mommy would be back, and they thought the only reason we heard only one was that mommy probably had moved the others to a warmer place. The one concern they had was that she was probably feral, for if she had a home, she would have had her kittens here.

Now we had a dilemma, we needed to find  the way she was getting in and fix that but if we did it too soon, mommy would not be able to get in to feed her baby. But the meowing was now not just a faint noise it was getting much louder and almost constant with only short rests in between. We were waiting for mommy to come back but she didn’t. We were very concerned that because she saw us she might abandon her precious one. We were assured with another call to the vet, this would not happen.

I was getting anxious though as Ron could not see any kitten or pinpoint exactly where the cries were coming from. So I called my daughter, Christine and her husband Glenn, who are in the roofing business, to please come and help. They were out-of-town so could not come immediately  we had to wait. The meowing was breaking my heart. I was having trouble believing that mommy was coming back even though we were assured she would. So several hours later Glen was up on the roof where he found the place mommy was getting in. We knew he had to seal it so other animals didn’t take up residence but we had a baby to worry about. Glenn then decided to find the little one from the attic and bring it down for mommy to take where she had taken the other ones. He could not find it but we could still hear the heartfelt meowing. Suddenly mommy showed up as predicted, but as Glenn was in the attic we were afraid of a confrontation with mommy and Glenn in very close quarters, so Ron decided to keep her away best he could by feeding her. She was starving and wolfed down the food he put out. That also was a sign she was a stray.  Christine and I could hear the baby and it seemed further down the wall now. Having mommy under control, Glenn was safely out of the attic and in the closet pointing to halfway down the wall where he said baby had slid to. Without hesitation he cut a hole in the wall near the floor of the closet and out popped this white ball of fur. The little angel was chewing on the gloves Glenn had on in a ravenous manner. Christine was desperately  mushing cat food up in her fingers while this little mit inhaled it every so often nipping a finger, She gave her water in the same manner. Baby looked at us with her big blue eyes as if she was thanking Glenn for rescuing her, and Christine for feeding her. The two of them bonded immediately. Now, we had a quick decision to make. Mommy was just outside the door eating and we had her baby in our hands what do we do? Do we give her to mommy so she can become another abandoned animal or do we break our promise and add a new member to our family? If it was just Ron and I to consider, the choice would be easy, but we are moving within a year and will be living with our son, daughter in law and grandson, and they have 2 cats already. After talking to the Humane Society we decided to be foster parents until we can get all of these things straightened out.

Yesterday we found out the kitten is a 3 week old little girl, who already thinks we are her family. She eats, plays, cuddles, and has stopped crying. Christine is in love with her and our grandson is coming to-day to see her for the first time, and we have asked him to name her. Now I ask you once they look into those beautiful blue eyes do you think she will have to find a new home? I think God dropped her into our laps.

How not to cut your hair

       This is just a snipit from my book A Hairdresser’s Diary

While at home one day I decided to cut my hair, a common occurrence. With my scissors in hand I was cutting just above my ear. I thought I heard someone at the door. I turned my head to listen closer, realizing it might just be Cercie our cat. I turned my head back, which caused me to stab myself in the side of my head with the tip of my exceptionally sharp scissors. OUCH! Anyone knowing about scalp wounds knows how profusely they bleed. I had blood spurting like a small geyser from the small triangular wound. I felt it run down my ear and neck. Shock and panic set in. Holding my finger on the wound, I ran across the street to my neighbour. Without knocking, I ran into their house. Fiona fainted as soon as she saw the spurting blood. Her husband Dan came in and found her lying on the floor. Trying to calm me and revive his wife, he informed me Fiona fainted at the sight of blood. No kidding! I think I could have figured that out for myself. I apologized and in tears, I ran back home, unsure what to do next. Dan called after me wanting to make sure I was okay. Afraid to remove my finger from the hole, I called my doctor for advice. It was suggested I remove my finger, to check the bleeding.Yes, it had stopped, so I asked about a tetanus shot. Snickering, the nurse said, “I will ask the doctor as soon as he gets up off the floor from laughing!” I admit it was a painfully stupid thing to do. Ron shaking his head in total disbelief, said, “Honey if you want to commit seppuku (Japanese form of suicide via sword) you have to aim lower, a whole lot lower” and then he broke down hysterically laughing. The sore spot on my head was nothing to the unmerciful teasing I received from family, friends and co-workers. Someone walked past me at work and whispered, “Snip, snip,” then smiled and winked. One of the other girls yelled across the room, “Anyone got scissors in their head, oh I mean hand,” every one would burst out laughing including me.

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